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I removed Page counter as it was out of control, not sure if someone isnt Playing with me... right now to day it has reached.... 282,864... 30,000 in one month? I dont get it... it scared me so I removed the counter, in case you think I was falsifying it... So now you dont have to worry, me neither... Hic...

let there be Joy in doubt... and love unique in loneliness... Numbers have no meaning... only kind words and good actions really mean something...

You knew that Already, but didnt realise it... was so Powerful and True...

Amen absent friends...

The Last thing you ever expected....

DEATH... You can drop dead anywhere... sitting in traffic, Shitting too hard, pushing your old body too far... It Comes... at light speed toward you... dont get too used to a normal day, as one normal Day you will "Drop"...

Universal Dynamic healing Love is all around you, the ultimate Algorithm's of Paradise are within and without you...

But What is the point of Paradise or Heaven huh? Idle times without food Sex or Massage... You never poop again.... what a drag Heaven must be.... coz I adore a good Shit...

no fun only perfect silence and the annihilation of free will... without the ability to lift a bottle to your mouth.... No Booze No Orgasams, that is more like Hell inverted... Who needs Heaven...

at least you feel something in Hell.... apart from the pain of burning... you conscience keeps you turning on the spit with all the other Pigs... and you cook forever never is there any relent...

You may become ashes but your Guilt lives for all time... endlessly being Liquidised in a foul Cess pit of your own making... only Pure souls survive the deluge of the body...

Who can Kill a good Idea?

Thank You Danielle

Thank you again... for sending me "Snow Patrol" I send you in return Heat Control... Hope your safe Hun... Think of you 3 times a month at least...

Hope you got a new Dog... Amen Sugar....

Xxx '~' stay Cool as you can...

Irretrievably inconceivable

Check your OXYGEN LEVELS... there aint much Fresh air Left... The end of YOUR LIFE IS IMMINENT... You dont have Enough Money to survive

only the truly poor know how to survive... Hope runs out HERE:

Good Luck with camping in areas filled with Awful Humans, who only want your money and Vagina... Don't Worry About Sasquatch or Gorilla's You are safer with THEM than Any Random Psycho human...

dont you get it Yet? People are always BAD... depending on their need for you money or help...

She Lives...

Yes Life has continued... My beloved Pal Gizmo LIVES, thank God for small Mercies.. She is half mine since I got Her in the first place... if they die I get her back...

click to enlarge...

Get some Animal Magic Yourself...

There is no way out

As soon as you live, you have the fate to expire... to die by falling fate or fire...

soon as you're born you are bound to die... only the living die... the dead dont live or die at all...

Please; dont be afraid, whatever happens, Happens... However awful painful and demeaning... be a Saint

dont react or do anything negative... surrender to reality.. you will if you intend it or not, You will surrender to the darkness...

close you eyes and come to life... a small moment of discomfort, then release into the eternal void of nothingness...

Farewell Bonnie Tyler and Ann Widdecombe, both have left scars on our hearts... and sorrow in our souls...

What a curse to be a Woman

Everywhere on Earth Women are Used and abused.. we are born of soft rape and seduction... every slit gets fingered... every hole gets explored... it is a nightmare incarnate, your Daughters are no more than Dick Wipes...

Rape of woman and culture is endemic.. when girls get GUNS they are safer... De Gauss the male, All men are BASTARDS...

There is no Truth only deviated lies of corrupted cultures.. Islam is an insult to ordinary human Dignity... many times over... it is the pursuit of very backward peoples...

How do we Stop THE ROT... Genocide never seemed more poetically appropriate, lets get on with the Job of "Cleansing all of Europe" of twisted wicked indoctrination's and immoral pursuit's.. will anyone hear my cry before we delete the past completely...

6.5m Jews were not enough to placate the superior echelons of factions multiplied throughout history.. Inhumanity itself is apart of our motivation for Nationality and unique identity and independence... from domination by "Other Tribes"

God Help those about to Die for no reason except the ethnicity of there original location... what kind of discriminations is This....

There is no hope for the perpetually ignorant: only the shock of finality...

Thanks,

Thank you God for this wonderful day... that is all I want to say..

The Kitten is gone;

I initially intended the sweet Puss to go to a friend of mine, after one day living with me, that was the reason I got it, subconsciously, they are the One who lost TOTO.. so I hope you can follow my Anti logic and Dumbass compassion...

After reading the AD I saw She was alone having lost both of her sisters FOREVER; I took pity of the tiny thing... So I determined to give it to the family of TOTO, to keep them safe loved and focused...

They are happy as a betrothed couple of sentimental softies... I missed Her a bit fir a few days but they are getting on great and are both better for having met the other....

Peace to all...

I Got me a Kitten...

Got me a Cat... Saw it on "GUMTREE" local garage sale typa site... there were 3, they had sold 2 so only one little 7 week old Kitten was left, and very lonely no doubt... I wanted to rescue it from sadness, now without a Mother, and in a new home life and living with Me and Bobby...

65 miles I drove to collect... I was worried my old car would tolerate it, I used dear old Sat-Nav on my phone, and it was perfect, we did no deviate one wsted mile, Got there, they were a young couple with a new Child... I had a carry case perfect for the occasion...

We exchanged a few polite verbal reflexes and I got the tot the tiny black baby I came to get... put her in the Carry case with a msh of holes and clear windows... so she was transported in calm and peace...

Bobby Got a bit aroused to grumble and bark a few times, but I gave him the Lowdown, in words and gestures... He Got it... do not attack the little black ball of Fur... and over an hour She crawled closer to Bobby... I would love to see them conspire to unite in one sleepy ball...

I didn't want to do it at all, but My Guardian angels insisted... You need it for the experience and commitment... keeps you fitter younger and happier .... a Life that relies upon you, which is a wake up call every few hours... Where is she what can I do to make Her feel at Home, Better, less lonely... as

She's now lost contact with Her Mother, and both Sisters were taken already... How Would you feel ? poor lost lonely little packet of life... I'll give it my best Shot, I got all the Accoutrement's needed... Litter Box, food, a Harness and leash are in the post, I want to let this tiny thing grow to love and enjoy life, this is a marriage of randomness.. I cam I saw and I collected...

A life to care for and to Love... Lucky me ... we are just about to sleep... all together... thank You God:

click to enlarge

Farewell to Toto...

A dog that I knew well 'Toto' She was 16 years old, a wire haired little Doggy, Who I witnessed only months ago Falling over in the Garden, and getting up again, such a pathetic sight, I got a short text from my friend, saying Toto had died in their Arms, after collapsing multiple times on the floor... on Sunday 7th...

Strangely enough on saturday I was looking at pictures of Her on my Monitor, which had been sent over time... and I said to myself... it will be a Sad Day when Toto dies... and She did the next day, But I only found out on Monday afternoon...

It hit me like a Mountain sized Meteorite, I fell apart, and to pieces... and bitterly wept like Mary at the foot of the Cross, OMG and ever since, Death of any loved living thing really gets you in the Solar Plexus like a Iron foundry in your Guts... 

It reminds me When Boo died in front of me Aug 13th 2019, it was a Religious experience like the Sermon on the Mount... 

I was touched by the tears of a Saint... for 7 weeks after I never felt so alone and got scared of the dark every night.. didn't eat for almost a week, How could you... Luckily I got Bubba or Bobby as I now call Him, just before the COVID crisis hit... on Sep 27th or it would have been much more difficult.. and been lonely much longer...

It brought me to my Knees, I went to Guildford Cathedral and lit a candle for Her, and cried like a starving child, where you can barely draw a breath, your diaphram wont co-operate...

That is a Primal reflex from deep inside for many reasons, the guilt that I didn't do enough...

So When I got the text, it was very personal indeed.. something nobody can share with you, you have to bear it alone like giving Birth, Death has the same depth of profundity.. in the other direction...

So Long Little Girl... I will think of you every day, just like Boo...

Rest in Peace Dear Toto... xXx

God Is a Machine... gun...

Hey! my Point is God (the creator of all things) is a MACHINE, not an organic living thing... it is more like A.I. than any flying spirit...

God is a Machine Gun and you are a single Bullet...

Those who hold the power, have the leash on the Dogs of Peace War and Paradise... But they hold no Mercy, have no Compassion, they are the enemy who is almost invisible that walks amongst us... Am I being racist or supremacist? no just realistic, not a Mystic or a crystal Angel I only want to feed my Children... is that a Problem:

And Your Children... 

Who saves the innocent, what single soldier has now power over a Machine GUN... Please save the Boy Warriors from more unnecessary Disasters created by Idiots and Arrogant fools...

STOP IT... Now: 

put the safety catch ON)

can anybody stop a powerful deluded FOOL,

as there are so many...

maybe you are part of them... just one moment of Love combined between us can change not just the future but Reality itself..

Stop bullets start throwing KISSES...

Stop the Mongerals of Mankind, with free Euthanasia, and Sterilisation, Eugenics will be enforced within 70 years, some Peoples must be persuaded to change, Or Die... this is the future of Civilisation:

So mote it be:

What is suffering...

Not so much being in pain, but not getting what you want... the edge of total tolerance... in a meaningless queue... waiting to pay, for something

I certainly wont be disappointed by Death... I have been waiting for such a long time to get through it... I cant Fucking wait (actually) but it is not the end of Torment or misery... you have the ultimate Identity Crisis...

WHO AND WHAT AM I... a giver a taker a faker fornicator a Masturbatur... all of the above and NOTHING AT ALL...

Just a completed circuit with no particular programming... an empty vessel at the bottom of the Sea with no future, unless discovered in the dark slimy depths of dark cold waters that will Annihilate You in an instant... remember OCEAN GATE... What a dickhead and a Loser...

Do not ask too many Questions, not all of them can be answered... The Truth is impossible to comprehend:

but the Pain is without relent...

The Future is Incredible, most of the past has been a mistake... that came too late...

Be Alive awake alert and Aware at all times...

The greatest Punishment...

Is, the Knowledge of your own guilt and wickedness... You never out live that Guilt you cannot Flush down the toilet of lost causes... 

You will never get to heaven/Paradise without a deep Enema of regret a Shit that never ends.... when you wake up hardly able to process the moment... You are the living Dead, Yes Zombies do EXIST...

and You are one of them, funnily enough... You ain't got no life left cept delusional dreams and spiritual Masturbation, that you were Good, and did Good...

Such a LIE... are you willing to be DE THRONED from the crap you believed... the only Truth is...

No Truth is definable by touch reason sex Drugs or conjecture We all face the same WALL of fear, those who have No fear survive the last moment...

Cowards Dissipate like clouds of Dust.... Only a Hero lives again...

Remembering BRUCE LEE with serious respect, 

Alternative Fatality

folks on DEATH ROW, should get a fair and reasonable Alternative... they get dropped in the amazon Jungle without Shoes or any tools whatever, if they can get out of the Jungle they win a week in a cheap motel then get shot in the back of the head, then get fed to hungry Pigs, hey; they will eat anything...

FILM IT ALL in 8k....

Hey it gives them HOPE witch is the greatest Compulsion in all human history... they will always Comply with positive suggestions... like any hostage clings to freedom...

let the victims do Personal justice to those who took their loved ones, Marshall Law Worldwide (like it is in IRAN) just kill anyone who looks like a threat... where the is no justice there is never redemption either..

Death is so quick and easy with an AK-47 with a full magazine in your hand, after it happens nothing continues to matter... 

it is actually fatalistically Beautiful: 

AT LAST it has happened..

to finally be dead and so Grateful to be such...

farewell all you sinners... welcome to the TOMB/

Send the wicked to the Jungle beyond equal... let them try to buy freedom from a thief...

Losing things...

You can easily lose everything in one thoughtless moment of Ego and Bravado, i.e. overtaking at the wrong time... screaming out loud and losing control... at a wedding or a funeral... or slapping the one you love for the first time... 

(there is no going back after that) to lose trust from just one is to lose all hope faith and good intentions... makes you a fraud)

Last night I nearly lost my mind forever.... I lost my Car keys, and went slightly psycho looking in every crack and pocket I could think of... I was extremely Hung Over... which amplified the emotion x7, started questioning my veritable "so called" sanity... This is something I DONT EVER DO, I took care of Keys my entire life...

Except the key to reason...

that is why it was so upsetting... But then; The Dog needed a Walk which doubled my inner frustration to locate the aforesaid missing keys... so we went out for a walk which I suffered second by second, as he sniff's and does not Piss... He searches and sniffs like a Botanist in search of the only wild orchid left on Earth... yet pisses such a little it needs 8 Leg lifts to empty his bladder....

It was a shorter walk than usual, and my discomfort grew step by step, I feared they were gone for all time... but as I walked up the stairs, my Prayer came to pass...

They had been in the door all night... I nearly lost all reason to live for a silly mistake like that... I was fantasising about hanging myself, imagining being in the Crematorium being burnt yet still conscious... Grim bottomless thoughts...

But I spent 10 minuets on my knees thanking God for finding what I thought must have been gone Forever....

Praise the Lord and King Charles for being such good sports !

Back to the Past...

You ain't got no future... when all your future is GONE... used up and wasted; Except trials tribulation and misery so dwell in the hell of the past... the older you get the further you think back...

The Past is a feast a smorgasbord of snacks... to be encountered by chance, by random association.. the older mind becomes fixated on the earliest memories.. as I go to sleep I explore the past like an inter-dimensional traveller in a bubble of focused thought... I see things I forgot ever happened...

Moments so vivid you would think you were there, I remember faces from 50 60 years ago as clear as a Clairvoyant sees ghosts and spirits... last night I was basically Praying for about 3 hours, horizontal... and visiting the places and faces of the long lost...

the closer you get to Death the more you recount the past; it is a vertical climb with every tiny hand-hold... until you lose faith and fall like a loser..

The past is Dead and immutable, only the present is Alive... the future is yet to manifest... Go back to the Crack and into the Womb go back to a Zygot and before the egg yet to be fertilised, you were there, and now your here... What great good fortune to be one in 6 million chosen to be "activated" as a possibility...

A life is a Collage of multiple images and impulses like some kind of random art... if your not involved with your evolution, i.e. no Ambition no will to do anything no need to meet "other people" you wont be a success by default... You need treatment:

finding out where you went wrong needs re evaluation by jumping from the top board into an empty swimming pool... then the transfixing overwhelming Cognition of your "mistakes and wrong turns" in a download of damnation...

if you can find a slither of hope in all this destruction, you will cope better...

I suggest you try Faith hope an Love as a starting point... then jump into a to cloudy void and hope your Ripcord actually works... 

Death and the past are walking just behind you, waiting for you to become the recent Past personally...

$14 a Gallon in UK

YES you hear me correct, it is actually more.. but $14 is what we pay on average for a gallon of Diesel or even Gas is $12 a gallon...

Come to England and get robbed blind, by street vendors scammers Jammers extortionists and crammers.... they want what you got PICK POCKETS all over London, They will clone your car lock transmission to a stealing receiver and open your, pride and joy from a distance...

Don't come to UK coz it is not OK... we are an increasingly Feral nation populated with a criminally intent subculture of pure latency to ROB RAPE AND leave you bleeding...

not all victims survive, after dark England is an Ant Colony coming to eat the sweet trust of the poor.. we are collectively robbed until money goes TITS UP, 

and pussy cannot pay the bill... what is the next unit of Value?

Blood Sperm and French fry's...

Timeo Americae

love to be Happy...

Wouldn't it be Wonderful to be happy again... that sense of excitement, be unable to sleep as you look so kindly towards the Coming... for the thing you most wanted for a moment

You too... but fate is marching like an Army toward you... the Destructive force at the core of your conscience... stops you from enjoying even a quiet fart.. When you were a Child you did not worry about anything... being happy is a flash Mob but it lasts only for a moment...

but some moments can last forever... 

on Video...

please click here...

Birth Life n Death...

Beginners Please; 5 min:

which Act are you in... a 3 Act Play with much Laughter celebration and Lamentation when you least expect it... there is no Exit nor Prompter to help you when you go Dry.... and wander in confusion with much exasperation and embarrassment...

Life is wonderful until you look Mortality in the face, remembering an old roommate from the 70's Ian Holmes Lewis I just read the backstory of his last years... 

He had a Lung transplant a year before he died... Holy bongo, What he must have gone through... that is no Disney Story.... and this is all some years ago... I was Shocked deeply considering all the implications, that is a Tough Last Act...

Be at Peace old boy...  he was a big Dope smoker, we all were then... but he loved Bongs, and they are Dangerous to sensitive lungs, I cannot imagine all the wrong people he got involved with... His Girlfriend way back then was called AURORA not a name you can ever forget... he never married Her, He got another Lady to do that...

I could fill 20 paragraphs with the names of dead people, who you have never heard of... they died in infamy, the famous Die in Public, but are they always remembered... thats some database...

When does the curtain come down, we are all desperate for a Drink a piss and a smoke.... Hurry up and get on with it... Hurry up and Die it is so boring to wait !!

Bring the curtain down... NOW

lol...