Sunday

Changed my Bed to Winter Configuration, a sad moment folding the Summer Quilt that Boo Died on, NEVER TO BE WASHED, but to be treasured each Summer, "the same side up"

Got the super Duck down quilt out as I have been feeling cold last few days, Haven't been out except to empty the dustbin...

Looking for a distraction to live, a reason to be, as the French say, its like climbing a sheer wall where at any moment you can fall fatally to a quick end, the dilemma is finding a reason not to give in to it, and "Let Go" just a thought, but one thought leads inextricably to another... until the last conclusion

which is inescapable that you will go to another Place without any Money Body or Face, a place where the past is a barbeque upon which you slowly agonisingly extinguish all hope of salvation, Hell is to try to go on when everything in you is GONE and you are no longer 'anyone' but a shadow

Veritably, a Memorial of your own Visions, a fragment of something once whole and wholesome, now tainted with the Cold flesh of Death, of a life you once embraced driven to Ashes of Ashes, 

The ~Personal dilemma is Silent and unrecognisable as speech, Clots of tears and Sobs to take your breath away, Cries to the Gods above unheard and unseen, the suffering of all in one small space, 

the state of grace you seek is only for the meek x