Sunday, 12 March 2017

Old Gal Update

Yet again; I see that Old Gal walking in the Park.. looking slightly flaky and demented.. She saw me, and kept looking back to see if I was gaining on her.. I pretended not to see Her.. She was 300 + yards away.. but My distance vision is very acute.. especially with binoculars..

Poor old thing.. I wonder if Shes Pre-Paid Her funeral.. they sell em hard on TV these days.. Her Daughter aint got long.. mind you they could bury Her in a Shoe box.. as there is so little of Her.. You could do the whole funeral for under a Tenner.. I nearly sent Her an anonymous Valentine card.. which would have read.. something like this; but with more heavily linguistic sculpturing, and distasteful imagery..

Nobody wants You for a valentine, who could want to be involved with a person, who is so deeply and tragically in love with themselves... so cold, mean, and self obsessed... with affected airs and graces, and pulled faces.. who wants a freak for a Lover, who resembles an anatomists donated corpse.. Eat something you vein cow.. get fat for christs sake.. 

Men want Chubby Fanny's not skinny dick grinders, cutting them to shreds with your sharp Pelvic bones!.. get a life and GET FAT you'll never look back.. Fat people may fart a lot.. but they are Happy!.. you miserable dour bitch.. enjoy a Good Shit for a change.. not a squirt of dark matter laced with Laxatives.. you ought to wear Nappies or a Tampon up your anus..

your Panties must look like a Pollock; with a heavy period plus permanent diarrhoea... mind you such things have won the Turner prize..

dont take offence I was just being playful if not brutally honest.. coz you will never be happy till you eat a decent meal, and feel full again... when your fat, Boys will want to shag you again.. coz Fat girls are so desperate for dick they'll fuck anything, even an Alsatian.. a well carved cucumber is every lonely girls friend.. then you can have a salad afterwards..

Yours sincerely quite concerned and somewhat repulsed:

send my good wishes to Your long suffering Mother..

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