A Horrible memory came flooding back to me.. the last moments I spent with an ex girl Friend.. a lifetime ago.. She was sitting in the Car with me, (a Lancia beta 1600, I loved that Car.. as much as Her.. it was in the 80's)
and we were poised to say our last goodbyes, I offered my left cheek for a parting kiss.. ( I wish I hadnt asked..)
Now I know what a corpse feels like like when you reluctantly kiss it... "Nothing".. She put her lips on my cheek without a single muscle of pout.. Dead Cold unloving lips, it was the final kiss of rejection... the unwanted gift She could hardly bear to proffer.. or stomach..
She got out, I watched her disappear into the house, then I drove away.. into this future.. Where I still feel pain at the thought of it: there were no golden tomorrow's after that, just years of desolation.. right up till today..
I never Got over Her.. Ever in all these years.. I just cant throw that heartbreak away... even today...
Love is a reward with punishment built in; that can change people into hollow shells, that whistle when the wind catches them dancing.. like the sound of a distant beach locked into its innermost hidden cavities to catch the imagination of lonely men lost on desert island shores who listen for a word of comfort, but only ever hear the crashing waves of infinity... laughing at your impermanence..
Excuse me while I go out looking for Ghosts... My favorite people are those you cant see.. the gone; the lost; the dead; but.. not forgotten.. till Death wipes all data away...
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