Sunday 19 August 2012

The Pitfalls of Telepathy

Perceptual sensitivity can often look like witchcraft... probably why so many People (mostly Women) who were so cruelly burnt at the stake... because they had an impediment of physicality, i.e. they were old spinsters who were ugly.. and let's be honest.. nobody embraces ugliness.. old age or disability.. even me, who is writing about it... which is a kind of personal paradox.. I am also repelled by the disfigurement which is a hate of self; of the self loathing..

However... Even Ugly people need love.. but they hardly get none, I dont mean Obesity.. that is entirely avoidable by self discipline... but nevertheless people will hate you from the half second they see You...

This is my specialised area of extra sensory sensitivity.. This is where it gets a little semi demi psychopathic... I want to hurt people who reject me on that check list.. as "undeserved of human approval" I "hear and feel it when it happens"

And I have truly developed that ESP  when I look into someone's eyes, or even just hear their voice, watch their body language.. and least of all hear their flailing inflection, (against their true will) I can hear it feel it and see it... most times it is a "Given"... it is not divisible or invisible, but I can READ it...

in the recent past i.e. most of my 59 years of life.. Starting with an Old lady who lived next door as a babysitter to me in "Rose Green, Catterick, Yorkshire" at age 3.5 to 4.5 years They left me with this ""really evil wicked old lady"" She lived next door... they gave her 10 Shillings as I remember, to look after me when they went shopping... and after they left me, I experienced a Spiritual hell that only serial murderers are familiar with.. Torment that She inflicted on me was life changing and monumental..

Also not forgetting the Rejection of the Feelings that My parents inflicted on me by leaving me with this old BITCH, because I was too much hassle to take with them at 3.5 years.. I screamed and cried like a Hysterical lynch victim.. That old Cow said to me, this is recorded in my Worthless soul forever and then some..

She said... after they were gone... " THEY DONT WANT YOU.. THATS WHY THEY LEFT YOU WITH ME".. and also many variations of this syntax... The worst bit is the first bit, which She repeatedly told me each time They left... She also peppered it with "You will never see Your Mother again".. I cried so much I could hardly draw a breath.. a Few Years later I said the same thing to another child, whos Mother gave me a ride home from school, after she got out to see sombody in a building... at that time I was only 6 yrs old, and my life of twisted emotions began.. and has never stopped.. i.e. I was set on a life of abusive behaviour to "OTHERS" whenever I got the opportunity..

THEY DONT WANT YOU.. of Course SHE KNEW I was too Young to really be able to understand, or to repeat all She said to me because WHO would believe such a young child?.. Such Evil to instil in such a Young mind so much sence of worthlessness... (I havent even told my Psyciatrist all this, thats why a blog is so therapeutic, You can Spill the shit and no-one gives a damn.. yet somone out there may identify or send invisible commpassion directly to the Soul

That started my parapsychology of Distorted Emotions which live with me to this day......... That is Why ( I am the person I am not to-day) in other words I am Blaming other people for why I am so fucked up today.. at the End of my life.. 

So to get back to the title of this piece, I can read that small inference in your mind that spills over via your soul, which equals "Mind reading"... I can feel discrimination from an email, let alone a personal conversation... but it is only 5% of a whole world or circle of thought and feeling... yet it is a part of the Process that makes up my perception of another's ambient behaviour...

No/Yes I am paranoid, that nobody ever tells the truth or ever says what they feel, so I have never been able to make long lasting relationships of any worth or depth, as I always get derailed even at my advanced age.. and therefore have no Friends, no family no lovers no real life that is natural and fulfilling all because this Wicked Old lady, poisend me, FOR LIFE, beliveing nobody could ever love me because, I simply was not worthy of it....

I cut out several paragraphs, as they were too disturbing to be believed, all I want to say is there are sadly millions worse off than me, no billions who are way worse off than me, but the fact remains, any suffering of any Human soul is the suffering of all others who have a molecule of compassion, but sadly those who are new-born and ignorant will be without any chance of knowing it, as Ignorance is Bliss... which is the biggest pity...

But believe me, I can smell discrimination with the faintest hint of behaviour.. by intimate minuscule association... the tremor of an eyebrow is a manifesto of intents, to me..

Thank God it is soon to be the End of the World.. I cant wait.. Very strange things are going to happen soon.. all over the world.. so watch out for the impossible to be in your street very soon...

join in to the 2012 Hysteria wagon, its tons of fun being scared shitless, but what a wild thrilling ride into eternity...

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